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Written 2003-10-06

It is probably true that most citizens of the United States don't know much about Canada. It is also probably true that when most people think of North America, they don't really include Canada in that thought, especially if you are from the USA. Today I shall end all ignorance by sharing with you some important facts about our illustrious northern neighbors.

The most important thing that we Americians need to know about Canadians is that we aren't better than them in everything. Let's just stop being pompous and arrogant and take Canada seriously for a moment. Canadians consume more Kraft Dinner than any other nationality. This is a feat. Cast aside all your ignorant beliefs about Canadians now and save face. These people are no joke.

I think I speak for all Americans here (even though I don't) when I say that we as a whole do not appreciate Canada the way they deserve. We think that we can taunt the and call them moose biters and smelly Canadian people just because we have mouths, but did you know that Canada has more donut shops per capita than the United States does? I think that you'll think twice about your silly remarks now.